HECKLER: Say something funny! C O M E D I A N: I don't do requests.

J. Ross Clara
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  2. I love you like a fat kid loves cake! - Scott Adams

  3. Love can change a person the way a parent can change a baby- awkwardly, and often with a great deal of mess. - Lemony Snicket

  4. When God Created Mothers"When the Good Lord was creating mothers, He was into His sixth day of "overtime" when the angel appeared and said. "You're doing a lot of fiddling around on this one." And God said, "Have you read the specs on this order?"... - Erma Bombeck

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More Quotes By J. Ross Clara
  1. I guess sometimes the truth just isn't worth believing... Personally, I've always felt that life's too short for truth. I'm just here to be entertained.

  2. The trouble with believing conspiracies is you start seeing them everywhere, right? And everything becomes a part of them. But, of course, the trouble with not believing them is becoming a dupe.

  3. HECKLER: Say something funny! C O M E D I A N: I don't do requests.

  4. My dad used to tell me that laughter was like a cough or a sneeze - the body's way of trying to expel something. But instead of some phlegm in your throat, or some dust up your nose, a laugh happened when something really true...

  5. Explanations are for cowards.

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